How to Build Relationships at Work (That Work!!)

Unless you’re a lone wolf, such as a programmer, you likely can’t get anything done without talking to at least one other person. Even for a programmer, at some point you will need to talk to someone in order to accomplish your task. This is something that everyone with experience can agree upon, especially those higher in the ranks. Any boss whose main goal is the success of his or her company knows that in order for things to work together well, the people doing the work must first have some sort of professional relationship.

This is most simply accomplished using an acronym called FORM. FORM outlines the steps you take in order to build rapport and trust with another human, in this case a coworker. The steps are as follows: Family, Occupations (which I’ve replaced with Education and Work History for obvious reasons), Recreation and, lastly, Message. Message comes in to play a bit later. It’s really quite simple, you ask about the person’s Family, i.e. where they are from, if they’ve got any children, etc. Then, ask about their Education and Work History, depending, mostly, upon their age. And finally, ask about what they like to do for fun. These steps come from the idea that nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care.

Your Message, the last letter in FORM, is synonymous with what you need from that person. If you are that persons superior, then you are likely asking them to do something. If you are an equal or subordinate, then you are likely asking for a favor or for approval. Either way, showing that person that you care about them, will help that utilitarian aspect of the relationship run more smoothly.

 

Written By David Rodriguez